Overcoming the fear: How to break out of your comfort zone and become a networking expert

By Ken Partridge

Networking! There are few words that immediately cause me fear, but networking is one of them.

The idea of walking into a room full of people I’ve probably never met before and trying to start a conversation with not just one of them but several, leaves me searching for reasons not to go. Do I have a prior commitment? Is there a family emergency I need to deal with? Am I not feeling well? Almost any excuse will do.

I take a little comfort in knowing I’m not alone in this fear. Dalene Allen, executive director of Business Network International Maritimes, says the fear of public speaking ranks higher than the fear of death in the Guiness Book of Records. I can believe it.

However, I’ve also discovered after years of interviews with successful newcomers to our region that the one thing they all have in common is a willingness to network. They all speak about breaking out of their isolation and starting on their successful life and career paths by opening themselves up to as many opportunities to meet other people as possible. In other words: networking.

So, how do we overcome the fear and become successful networkers? Allen has a few suggestions. First, she say we need to realize what the problem is and confront it.

“Identify the challenge and address the answer,” she says. “Most people don’t even identify the challenge and just go with the fear. The two biggest things holding people back from networking are imposter syndrome and fear.”

Of course, addressing the fear means we have to move out of our comfort zones, Allen says.

“A lot of people, the first thing they do when they enter a networking event is scan the crowd for someone they know and then make a beeline for them. That’s the wrong approach.”

Instead, Allen suggests being early to networking events. “Then you have your pick of where and with whom you can start a conversation.”

Not sure how to start a conversation? Me neither. However, Allen has some suggestions there too.

“When most people go to a networking event, they think it’s all about them. It isn’t. It’s about the person in front of you. So, be interested, be curious, say something that makes the other person feel special. Pretend you’re talking to your best friend.”

Changing your perspective is key, Allen says. Many people see themselves as introverts and avoid networking situations as a result, yet Allen says teaching introverts to be better networkers is much easier than teaching extroverts.

“Networking is really about being a good listener. Introverts are already good listeners, so it’s much easier to teach them.”

Most things are easier if you approach them with a plan. Networking is no exception. Decide in advance what you consider a successful networking event to be. How many people do you want to meet? Do you want to exchange business cards? How many? What does a meaningful connection look like to you? How are you going to follow up on those meetings and connections?

“Always enter with intention,” Allen says. “Try to walk out with at least three good connections.”

Social media also offers some great advantages to make your networking more successful.

“If you’re going to an event you have to register for, you can probably find out who else is registered,” Allen says. “Look up other attendees on LinkedIn to learn more about them and identify ones you want to make a connection with. Then, send them a link request. Now not only do you have a reason to attend, but you know more about who you’re going to meet, and they feel comfortable meeting you because you’ve already reached out to them.”

Remember, this is just a step on your immigration journey. Making connections leads to opportunities for you to learn about and find a career in your field of choice. It’s a great compliment to all the work you’re doing upgrading your skills and credentials so you can make your immigration journey a successful one.

Are you looking to advance your career? Would you like to get your credentials recognized in a Canadian context? The Atlantic Immigrant Career Loan Fund (AICLF) has helped hundreds of newcomers to Atlantic Canada overcome the financial hurdles blocking them from their dream job. Visit www.aiclf.ca to see how the program can help you. Ken Partridge is the marketing and outreach coordinator for the AICLF. He can be reached at kpartridge@isans.ca.